Rating:
Let’s be honest this time (yeah). This is my favorite horror movie so far. Haven’t seen anything as well done as this yet. The acting is great, the atmosphere tense, there’s scary parts but at the same time, it’s a lot easier to believe the story, than in most cases of those “fake documentaries”. Oh and it’s spanish. Of course the states did their version, where the young journalist is played by the actress who plays Debra Morgan on the show Dexter. Well, that was a bad call but I’m gonna review “Quarantine” sometime soon anyway so I’ll tell you more about why it sucks. This on the other hand is a work of art. The plot is fairly simple, a young journalist and her camera man are making a pretty boring documentary about spanish firemen. Some mild towel spanking in the shower, sitting and waiting for the call, you know how it is. And if you don’t then now you know what firemen do when they don’t go to a fire. Anyways, they get a call about some domestic problems, and are supposed to help, even though there’s no fire. They encounter an old lady, that turns out to be infected with something, and then we have our regular zombie movie, but made to look like a fake documentary. There’s of course some mystery of why this all happened, and some pretty shocking finale that made me jump on my chair a couple of times in the theatre. A really great experience because this is not overdone in any way. Spaniards prove that they’re know what they’re doing when it comes to horror movies. Damn right!

Rating:
Sure, Stephen King is a horror author. Sure the “children of the corn” novel was pretty good. Sure. But what a boring piece of filmography this is. I cannot imagine. They tried to do it oldschool, but it didn’t quite work. The movie is boring, and the idea of a grown, military guy beating up kids is funny at most. Sure, there was supposed to be mystery, and atmosphere. And weirdness all around. But instead we see the kid from Dexter pretending to be righteous/evil, but he’s not at all convincing at it. Some little segments were actually good, and the scenography of a deserted town, plus the beginning sequence. But then it just went downhill.
Basically a couple is traveling through the country, while in the middle of nowhere they hit a little kid with their car. They decide to take him to the nearest town, the problem being – nobody’s there. The town is deserted (well except for the killer children, but they don’t know that). Then we discover that the children are a part of some weird amish-killer-cult and the couple is in trouble. Pretty standard, but it doesn’t work. Sorry.

Rating:
There’s one good thing about this movie. Well maybe not good, but creative for sure. They use a combination of two footages, one supposedly real, and the other “acted”, comparing both videos at the beginning of the movie. So we start to think, ok, that’s a movie, but it seems like it is based on some real events. Of course it all fails to deliver, but for a second there I got fooled. Mila Jovovich is one of those actresses that rarely break out of a genre, that being horror (or action horrors like Resident Evil ) so it’s not really a surprise to see here there. Ok, so what is it about? Basically it’s all around confessions of people who were abducted by aliens, and how similar what they say is. Tries to by scary but fails at it. Mostly it’s just annoying and after first ten minutes all the initial good impressions are gone. Sorry…

Rating:
So here’s another japanese idea transformed into a hollywood friendly horror film. Generally that usually means a complete lack of the japanese mysticism and atmosphere. And I’m happy to say – not this time! It has such a great inner tension without the simple scare tactics it kept me in focus for the whole time. Here’s the plot: a single mother and her young daughter move into an old, big apartment building. The mom doesn’t earn much so they live in pretty bad conditions, but the love and family spirit are there. And then comes the leak from the ceiling, of really really black water, after failures to fix it the mom goes upstairs and tries to investigate. The building is old and scary, and the characters are great. Especially the janitor guy was amazing in being a weird guy. Recommend it as an example that remakes don’t always suck

Rating:
A sad duty for me was that since this movie was pretty high in the “best earning” scary movies of 2009, I decided that I will watch it. Wasn’t expecting much from this, especially since Beyonce was cast, and I don’t really like her “art” in any form. But hey, guess what, it’s not bad. Of course it’s not a horror at all, there are no scary moments and no real suspense. It’s a pretty good thriller though. Without pretending to be overly smart this movie depicts a psycho stalker girl who becomes obsessed (hence the title) with a guy that was already married to Beyonce’s character. The study of the psychosis is actually pretty well done and the acting of the “evil girl” is actually sometimes VERY good. The rest tries to keep up the pace but they fade away in her shadow. Not an amazing piece, but good enough for a watch with some friends and a pack of popcorn.

Rating:
What the hell is that? first of all the poster is a total rip-off from Pandorum and the movie is a poorly written SAW ripoff that has a fat stupid idiot as the evil mastermind which is not at all believable. I wonder why can’t they come up with something original? You know, the monochrome tv screens with images of people in odd metal contraptions were done already. So was the gore + metal elements. Don’t watch it, seriously it’s only BARELY better than twilight, somewhere along the lines The Hatchet . A total waste of time plus very unoriginal.

Rating:
Wow! What a waste of time. But ok, let’s start from the beginning. Some sorority sisters decide to pull a prank on one of the guys, but the whole thing backfires. And then, months later someone starts killing them, reminding them of what they did. Pretty cliche. What’s even funnier is that there’s at least half the scenes where the girls are just in their underwear, or barely naked anyway. So is that the idea to draw the audience to the screen ? Maybe it would, if the girls wouldn’t be so terribly stupid. A typical american teen psychodrama, with the main bitch calling the rest of the girls bitches and all of them being so forward and liberated. The fact is that it all looks fake and I have no idea who is this directed to. Beats the twilight, but that’s not really a compliment now, is it ? Unless you like watching teenage girls in panties being killed, try to avoid this one. There’s no point, there’s no real story, that is all just made up stuff to have more time for the half-naked girls on the screen. And yet they called it a horror. The most terrifying thing about this movie is the overwhelming stupidity of both the plot and the characters.

Rating:
Final Destination was amazing. I mean the first part. It was new, had good music (Nine Inch Nails anyone?) and the acting was well, good enough. And adding the guy from american pie, this time as a weirdo-looser guy made it all the more cool. So then they made part 2, part 3 and now part 4. But what could be new in part 4 that wasn’t done before? Well let’s do it in 3d. That’d bring people to the theaters right ? Well it turns out those guys were right, but this is not a good movie. It was a bit less than OK. First the story – a racetrack accident avoided by a vision, and then people start dying one by one. Some of them die suddenly, some by a series of odd events. But this is so bizarre and so “The Incredible Machine” (the game) sometimes. The first one was “odd” but it wasn’t so overdrawn (yeah I like that word) and obviously fake. If you like the series then ok, go ahead, but it’s just for money. It’s all about cash and making more of it. We’ll probably see Final Destination 5 with an accident in a public swimming pool when the heater breaks and boils the people. And the first one will die out of boredom…

Rating:
Well we all love the Jason character. He’s impossible to kill, he has a sharp machete in his hand, the hockey mask on his face and is afraid of water. Oh and what’s best he kills teenagers so I’m off the hook. He really loves the ones about to graduate, so we can say he has good taste in teens. And there are plenty of those every year in every movie. So this time he does it again, and the scenario is pretty much standard. A bunch of kids go to a house in the country, close to crystal lake, and they mess up with the wrong hockey-masked guy. Not bad, considering that it’s made by all the typical standards of 2009 – pretty teens, beer and pot jokes, gruesome deaths but you don’t really see much. Stuff like that. Oh and teen sex scenes. They need to add those too for it to be “modern”. If you can see through that and just enjoy it then do. If you expect a horror to be at least as deep as crystal lake itself you better look elsewhere.

Rating:
Not really a horror but a pretty decent thriller instead. A guy travels the country meeting single moms (but ones with kids) and trying to become a part of the family. But usually at some point it stops working and he ends up killing the family, changing his appearance and moving on to another single mom The plot is actually not that bad, it’s a pretty cool idea. The main problem with this movie is the fact that it has the hollywood stench all over it. Sure the acting is pretty good, there’s suspense, there’s some drama. But it’s all so “typical” and cliche that it’s easy to know things ahead of them happening. But well, sometimes entertainment is about that. That is not a scary movie, rather a decent thriller.