Inkubus is Robert Englund and not much else, too bad we've seen a similar scenario somewhere ...

A guy comes to an old police station with not too many officers on duty, and turns himself in. Of course he confesses to murders and of course he’s creepy as hell. Sounds familiar? Almost like the movie “The Traveller” with Val Kilmer, right? Well not exactly – this time the movie is inKubus, and we have good’ol Freddy Krueger here, but without the burnt-face-man ensemble and claws. Well – we already know the plot isn’t original, so is there anything good about this movie?

The best thing here is Robert Englund. He’s a great horror actor, and delivers a performance that really IS creepy. The rest of the cast stays in his shadow, and the plot itself isn’t that interesting to keep you focused. What is, is the character of inkubus (written with backwards K) and mainly for that reason it’s an interesting watch.

Still it’s not a movie I’d normally recommend – it’s a bit borring, a bit unoriginal, and a bit silly. There’s an amazing acting performance here, but not much to wrap it around. Only for Krueger’s fans.

Why does this happen at all? Come on Wes Craven, do something different instead of milking that same cow over and over again.

So we get another part of the Scream series, in which the most innovative thing is that the killer uses an iPhone to call his victims, instead of those old, heavy and bulky cellphones from previous movies. I’m pretty sure he’s playing angry birds too, waiting for his victims. Or maybe fruit ninja, to practice his cuts and stabs. This is more of a comedy than a horror movie – the only horror’y thing here is the cliche loud noise with someone jumping out. The rest is typical teen gore that’s not completely bad, but nothing inspiring too. If you want to laugh over a beer or two with your friends (or your cat) over some teens being stabbed.

It’s really like a movie inside a movie, that became so iconic in a way, that it’s laughing at itself. In that respect it works and is even pretty fun sometimes. But even as a self-parody I’m not quite sure if it’s actually needed.

Not a horror, still good though

Faces in the crowds is another dive of Mila Jovovich into the thriller/horror genre, after the action packed Resident Evil series. This time though she’s not as tough (probably for the first time and she’s not killing thousands of zombies. So if you were expecting here to run on the ceilings and shoot at the same time, you’ll probably be disappointed. But the good thing is that this is actually a movie about something, without cheesy 3d effects like throwing the sunglasses at you for no reason. Yeah, I still remember that crappy and pointless scene. Here we have a pretty decent thriller based on a neat idea of a loss of facial recognition memory. In other words – she has seen a killer, but due to a trauma she can’t distinguish people’s faces anymore. So the killer can be anyone. Her husband? The police detective. Her grandma. Me. Well maybe not her grandma, but the gardener perhaps?

The idea is cool and she actually does some acting instead of stunts here which is nice for a change. The movie is pretty well developed, doesn’t get boring quickly and is fun to watch. Not a horror, but if you’re looking for a decent thriller you should definitely check it out.

Stephen King is supposedly the master of Horror literature, and that in most cases is proven to be true. Sure he had some really bad books, but he also wrote Misery, Pet Semetary, The Stand, Carrie, Cujo and The Shining. So we can forgive him for slipping up sometimes. Who we cannot forgive are people who try to milk the successful author’s name by making movies out of his short stories and other unreleased things.

Riding the Bullet could’ve been a classic example of that philosophy, but thankfully it didn’t turn out completely bad as I predicted it to be. The story is about an art student that’s obsessed with death (aren’t they all?). His girlfriend dumps him (sort of), his mother’s in a hospital, and he has to hitch a ride to get to that hospital on halloween. The setting seems to be perfect for a good story. Especially when he gets picked up by a being that’s certainly not a human (although it looks like one). They chose the right guy for the role too – David Arquette is a guy that can be confused with some non-human entity (especially for his “Scream” appearances). So yeah it works out. We got a wimpy art student that’s not at all likeable, his alter-egos, some random people and the road at night.

Scary? No, not really. Fun to watch? Sometimes. If you want to see something based on Stephen King see it. If you’re a fan see it. But ask yourself this: If it’s just a short story, and you probably never heard of it, maybe there’s a reason? A steady 3 stars for this one folks.

Rating: 1 out of 5 stars

The first "Wrong Turn" movie was something new. It was also pretty decent, entertaining and well made. Due to it's sort-of-success a sequel was made, and then the third installment. Each one was much, much worse than the one before, simply showing us that milking the same idea by uncreative people is as common as it is frustrating. So yeah, when I noticed that there’s a part “4″, this time set during the winter I though “Well ok, I’ll give it a shot”. Hoping for something different I rented the dvd, sat down, opened my beer and pressed play. What followed was 90 minutes of evil horror. Too bad it wasn’t because the movie was any good. It sucked so bad that watching it was more of a horror than the movie itself.

First of all it was way more disgusting than any of the parts before. The “Characters” are so stupid, with badly written dialogue that I actually wanted them to die as soon as possible. Well done – doing characters and plot the way that people hate them. Whoop dee doo.

The plot is a little different than before – now the inbred evil trio of brothers seems to occupy an old mental institution that got abandoned after they broke free 30 years before and killed everyone. And I’m asking here and now – Where IS THE LOGIC? I mean they killed everyone in the hospital (and probably ate them), and why didn’t anyone come? Like the police, army or whatever? No instead they just decided to stay there and live. That’s as dumb as a stick with a rusty nail.

Then we have the forced gruesomeness that is not scary at all, just disgusting as hell. The inbreds are pretty similar to the ones from the previous “wrong turns” which is a good thing for continuity, but it’s hardly “part 4″ when some of them died in the first three parts, and now they suddenly all resurrected. Unless “Bloody Beginnings” mean that they simply moved out of the asylum to the woods later on. But that we can forgive. The rest of the shit they keep serving us here we can’t. Sorry, no dice. This is what’s wrong with the horror movie industry. It’s movies like this, made by completely un-creative people that create the illusion that most horror movies suck. And if you want to see a decent “abandoned mental hospital” movie see “Grave Encounters”. This is a definite waste of time.

The Ward is almost a typical psychological/psychiatric ward thriller that we've seen a couple of times before. A little bit of Shutter Island comes to mind almost instantly, but this movie actually has a horror side to it. Not really scary, but entertaining. The movie starts with a girl burning down an old house and then being move to the insane asylum. The main problem is that 50 years ago standard ways of treating insane people were electroshock therapy and lobotomy, which is actually widely used in movies from that era. So the girl ends up in the hospital with a couple of other girls, but suddenly they start dying, being killed by some ghost/monster/evil thing that resides in the place.

The pace isn’t terribly slow, with plot twists happening every now and then, and near the end we are certain that there’s gonna be a huge twist right there. Too bad it’s predictable, but still it’s a pretty decent film, without many flaws aside from lacking originality sometimes. I recommend it for a movie night with friends, even though most people will forget it after watching. A job well done, but no genius in this insane asylum.

American teenagers. Will they ever learn? Chatting away on myspaces and facebooksm with total strangers and then pretty surprised when the stranger tries to kill them. Boo hoo. Unfortunately this movie didn’t quite work for me. The idea waw promiwing, to ahow that cellphones and internets can also pose a threat. You know, two sides of things.

But what we get is a typical teen horror in which the killer’s smart, the teens are stupid and all hope for anything good is lost. Well there’s one epiphany scene in this movie that is actually pretty good, but it doesn’t really contribue much to the movie itself.

They tried to raise awareness to the fact that those tech gadgets we use although useful and nice do have an other side to them. Stalkers, pervs, killers, hackers, nerds and colin powell. Nah scratch that last one.

Anyway, it has a lot of gore for a typical american movie, but aside from that it’s what it is. A typical american teen horror that tried to be something more with a pretty good idea. Too bad the idea was poorly executed. I’d worry more abaut aspartam in my food than the serial killer here. Oh and the characters have no personality, they’re not likeable so I didn’t care much for their deaths. And that in a horror film can be a bad thing.

Now send this link to 5 friends or you’re all dead tomorrow ))

Ok, let’s make it all clear. I hate disgusting horror movies like Hostel and Frontieres. I seriously think that movies need a lot more to be really scary than eyeballs popping out in a realistic way. Those movies are not even horror to me, they’re a way for us to see how sick can we be without looking away. Or whatever. You get my point.

Martyrs is different. It still has an amount of disturbing images, and I mean REALLY disturbing, way more than any Hostel movie ever managed – but at the same time it tries to have a story, a meaning of some sort. It tries to ask questions. And even though the story is not the most clever thing ever written, for some reason this movie got stuck in my head. It’s EXTREMELY disturbing. VERY disgusting. Definitely not a movie for everyone.

And normally I’d give it 1 star and tell you to stay away. But this time it all sort of fits together. It’s not senseless violence for the sake of blood and gore. This movie isn’t even scary. At all. It asks some questions, mostly about afterlife. It tries to be smart.

I think it doesn’t really “win” in it’s category. It’s not a great movie. But it’s so different from everything else, that if you can stand “disgusting images” then you should give it a try. But if hostel was too violent for you, you better stay away.

The dvd box was pretty straightforward : a woman is trapped in her office parking lot on christmass, when everyone else left, and there’s a psycho trying to catch her. So I knew what to expect from the start. And guess what. They didn’t lie. This is exactly what this movie is about. In fact, the description is so exact, there’s really not much else going on there. No real plot twists, no unpredictable moments, this just goes from point A to point B with a couple of interesting scenes in between. The good thing is the fact they only needed a parking lot (well mostly) so it was pretty easy to build atmosphere. A dark lot, some cars left, some elevators, emergency stairs. And of course even though the building is new and modern there are some flickering lights.
Doesn’t it annoy you that in real life you see those flickering lights maybe once or twice, and they’re there in every movie ? That’s a cliche tension builder right there.

The acting? I’d say it’s good enough, not great but this is not a movie you’d remember anyway. Good enough pretty much says it all. The story – well being locked out someplace with a psycho on your trail is not really anything new, but at least the parking lot is new, right? Next we’re gonna see a lady who got locked out at a carnival with a crazy carousel technician out to get her. Or stuff like that.

But anyway, it’s a nice flick to watch with friends, have a few laughs here and there, and jump on your seats once or twice because of some sudden noises. What more to ask? If you’re looking for a horror classic / masterpiece this is definitely not it. But if you’re looking for a fun movie, I think it is just that.

I really like Bill Moseley. I mean he’s “that horror dude” right? Well if you like him too you’d be disappointed because he’s not really onscreen much. Nah, instead we get a mix of “Saw” psychopath with a “deep” voice, bombs, paranoia and childhood traumas. All of that combined into a movie that’s actually not bad. But not perfect either. And somewhere halfway through we can actually guess what’s going to happen and how it’s all gonna end. Still there are some nice locations and sometimes, only sometimes it really has a nice atmosphere. Not scary, because it’s not a typical horror movie by any means. It’s more of a thriller with a little bit of supernatural, but with movies like that, which aren’t good or bad the main question is – will I manage to sit through it, enjoy it and not skip forward / play a game on my phone during it?

The answer is yes. And that’s not bad I guess. The acting here is OK, but there are some moments that are pretty terrible too. The atmosphere is there, some mystery, nice locations, Bill Moseley. Yeah, I think it’s “good enough” to watch. Oh and don’t get fooled by the ad’s this movie is not really about faith or religion (or the devil). The fact that the main character is attending a seminary doesn’t make the movie about religion. Come on.